Most little girls dream of their wedding day, and we tend to imagine that it’ll be a huge, lavish affair. I had a micro wedding in January of 2018, though at the time, we didn’t know that doing things our way would later be classified as the micro wedding trend. 2020 has many young couples taking a step back and realizing that their best day ever shouldn’t put them in debt forever.
My husband and I already planned on getting married, though we imagined at first that it would be a giant, tiring episode that would leave me sipping champagne in our bathtub afterward in an effort to relieve stress from all the chaos. Instead, ten people watched us tearfully say our vows, an ordained friend helped us tie the knot while another shot our professional photos, followed by dinner at our favorite restaurant. And you know what? I’m glad we cut out all the chaotic frills and six-foot-long guest list. I married my best friend, and at the end of the day, that’s what it’s about, you and your partner—no one else. With that being said, here’s everything you need to know about the micro wedding trend of 2020!
What is a Micro Wedding?
Basically, a micro wedding is a small, intimate wedding with no more than 50 guests (some say 20) that tends to still have “traditional” highlights without the frills. Here’s the thing: you can basically get married in any public space, as long as you ask. It can be your favorite cafe, restaurant, the park where you had your first kiss, a cemetery—wherever!
Some places might ask for some sort of “donation” and you may have to sign a contract saying they aren’t liable for any damages or injuries that occur during the event. Whatever and wherever you decide, everything you need to know about the micro wedding starts with picking a venue first. Doing so will provide the foundation for how you build the rest of the ceremony.
*Pro-Tip: sometimes just mentioning the words “bride” or “wedding” can make that price tag jump. If you really want to pinch your pennies, just say you’re throwing a big party. It can still be fancy (duh!)
The 2020 Micro Wedding Trend
While small, intimate weddings aren’t exactly a new concept, (I see you military spouses), our generation of elder millennials are gravitating towards the micro wedding thanks to a drastically different economic climate than prior generations. Diamonds, for several reasons, have plummeted in sales as we opt for less expensive, more meaningful gemstones with better karma. (I wasn’t cool with the bad juju of the diamond industry, so I dumped the tradition of that hyped-up rock, selecting purple tanzanite). COVID has canceled almost every wedding we’ve been invited to, several have chosen Zoom weddings and Facebook live streams. So it’s no wonder the micro wedding trend has jumped to the forefront of the bridal market, especially in 2020. Besides, instead of eating your wallet, micro weddings give you a chance to set money aside for a home, vacation, or whatever else you want, and setting yourselves up for your future together is a much better investment.
How To Plan a Micro Wedding: The Basics
Invite Fewer Guests, Do Less Work
The days of stressed-out brides might finally be coming to an end, and just like comedian Iliza Shlesinger suggested in her stand-up special, “Elder Millennial,” brides are finally going to have fun! The reality is the more people you have involved and invited to your wedding, the more stressful it gets, and the more “I think you shoulds” start flopping out of people’s mouths when you never asked. But cut those numbers down and you’ll start to feel the bliss that is meant to come with marrying (hopefully) your BFF for life.
Smaller events also give more room for freedom and creativity. You get to spend more time with each guest, something that tends to get lost in a larger ceremony. Detaching yourself from some of the confines of “wedding traditions” can be very liberating in the long run (like that weird garter toss ritual…yikes).
Dress Up in Love
Whatever you want to wear, still make the effort to dress up for your big day. It doesn’t have to be a giant cream-puff ball gown or tux—it doesn’t even need to be white or a dress at all for that matter. In 2020, a lot of brides are turning their backs on “bridal gowns” and going bold with other colors or straight into bridal pantsuits, jumpsuits, blazers, and shorts. One of this year’s biggest wedding trends, and probably for the first time ever, (goths excluded) is black. Besides, styles that aren’t labeled for a bride, such as evening wear, will ask way less of your wallet.
Get a Photographer
No matter what, DO get a professional photographer. Whether it’s a friend, or friend of a friend, or included in a micro wedding or elopement package, you’re going to want decent photos taken of your wedding day. Jove Meyer, owner and creative designer of the event company with his namesake, says the one thing that’s persisted in 2020 is a legendary snapshot of the newly wedded couple: “The micro wedding trend persists and though, as a result, the guest count has reduced, the couple’s desire for epic photos of the day has increased.” Plus, just think of how cool and progressive your kids will think you were (maybe) for being non-traditional.
Prepare Yourself for Potential Resentment
Even though it’s no one’s business but yours and your partners, be prepared for potential disapproval when people find out you’re having a very small wedding—and they may not be invited. Not to mention those that are invited might try to push you to have a larger wedding because “that’s how it’s done.” My husband and I still get flack from some people because we chose to have a small wedding with the only guests being our nuclear families and the few friends that contributed to making our big day happen. The best part is we made all these decisions together so as long as you go in with firm confidence, people will think better about how to conduct themselves. And if they don’t? Well, just remember, it’s not about them, it’s about you and your partner.
Get a Few Pros to Help
If you find yourself overwhelmed and in need of help, you might want to check out micro wedding services that specialize in putting together small ceremonies on the fly. Just keep in mind that there may be a limit on what you can do, with very few selections in what they have to offer. Still, these planners can take off a load of stress as they take care of planning, photography, venues, and even keepsakes!
There you have it, everything you need to know about the micro wedding trend! At the end of the day, remember to have fun, no matter what you decide to do. Whether it’s running down to the courthouse and then meeting friends and family at your favorite restaurant a la “Sex in the City” style, eloping, having a big traditional bash, or a micro wedding, it’s about what you and your spouse want and what makes you happy. Even if that’s getting married in a storm, which is said to be good luck anyway.
Did you have a micro wedding? Let us know in the comments and share your experience!